Your response to this blog is due by Sunday, December 7th at noon. Read the chapter on Habit 4 this week and be prepared for a discussion in the library in class either Thursday or Friday.
Look over the section on the 6 paradigms of human interaction on pages 206-210. Choose one of the paradigms and describe an episode/event in your life that illustrates that paradigm. This one might take you a while to think about! Be sure to mention which paradigm you're describing. I look forward to hearing from you all.
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I can find many instances in my life in which I have been involved in a lose/win paradigm. Generally, my personality aligns with this way of thinking. For examply, when any confrontation evolves with my friends, I back off. One of my friends is touchy-feely, and loves to spend time with people. When I say that I'm busy or would rather just spend an evening at home with my family or reading, it becomes a problem. Rather than argue with him, I concede to going out, and though I am midly bitter and resentful, I suppress these feelings and put on a happy face for his victory, rather than make him lose while I win. These feelings do undoubtedly resurface, as Covey suggests, in ways that are less than desirable. Later, with this same friend, we got in a fight over a simple matter of what to do on a Friday night. This mindset of lose/win is hardly beneficial when the consequences are considered, but in a temporary mode, where one can avoid confrontation with friends and family, it has its benefits.
I can constantly find charasterics of myself that express the Win/Win paradigm. I feel that this is a reasonable representation because I always to try and find what the benefits of something are. Im always asking myself "whats in it for me?" and I believe that if two people dont agree with one another, they can create a new compromise that fufills both of their views.
I find that most of my life, especially my school life life is dictated by the "Win" paradigm. For example, when it comes to tests and grades I take it upon myself to do my best and to fulfill the task at hand and when someone says they can't get it done or didn't get the assignment done, I feel very indifferently. This is not to say that I am cold and emotionless, because I consider myself quite the opposite, but rather I have been down the path of helping others and trying to achieve the "Win, Win" paradigm. Unfortunately pursuing that end usually resulted in more of a "Lose, Win" or "Lose, Lose" situation. Consequently, I have chosen, at least in this aspect of my life, to separate myself from the others and focus on my own well being.
I'm definatly going to have to say I'm a Win/win. In my family we literaly have to make deals and contracts to benifit both parties. For insance, when I reseaved my car, my Dad had me sign a 5 page contract. This in turn gave my dad authority over use, and me and my sister benifited by reaseving a car to go almost anywhere we wanted to.
I am a win paradigm. I win, who cares what you do, take care of yourself, NOT MY PROBLEM. I hold no special love or hate for humanity. It can fail or succeed on it's own accord. I'll work with it if it helps me, I'll ignore it if it stays out of my way, and I'll destroy it if it alligns against me.
I like using the example of the cheating student. I'll work on my own because I know I can win, I don't care if other students are cheating near me, and if someone tries to cheat off me I will refuse them becasue getting caught will hurt me while helping them won't do anything for me.
My victory is not for anyone, but me. My victory can be being nice to somebody to get what I want later. It can be doing something good so someone else is happy and I feel good. By the end of the day though, every action, thought, and belief is for my win, my victory, my course of action.
I find charasterics of myself with the win/win paradigm. I always try to find a compromise where both parties win.
Throughout my life i have been in more of a win/win paradigm. Every situation i'm put in i try to make sure there's a compromise so that its a win/win situation, and that its fair and equal.
About 6 months ago i got pulled over, and the police officer informed me that i was going too fast, however he didnt give me a ticket. This instance proved a win win because i didnt get a ticket and the police officer scared the crap out of me so i dont speed anymore.
In basketball sometimes a coach asks you to do something that you think can not help the team at all. Like if he asks you to sit on the bench for a game, you want to play but if you complain it just gets worse. But if you sit there and take it he will not notice you at all.
I often find my self in a win/lose paradigm. In many situations I way the Benifits of one thing against the negative aspects of another. Many times I use this when debating wether to study or not. I often way the negative aspects of studing ie. boring against the positibe aspects of it ie. making a better grade on the test. Most of the time this helps me make the correct choice.
I would describe myself as a win/win type person. When i set my mind to something, i strive to make all parties involved happy.
Sometimes your parents make you do something that doesnt make any sense or help you in any way.
Ive recently experienced a win situation because I am reading The 7 Habits and I am becoming a better person because of it. This applies to this situation because it benefits me.
In my life, the "win" paradigm is probably the most prominent. Most people live their life this way, as they simply look out for their own interests. For me, a certain instance of the "win" paradigm would be my college application process. I am indifferent to others' application process because what college I get into will ultimately only affect me. This is not to say that I won't be happy for someone getting into their college of choice, but it just doesn't really affect me beyond that. Getting into college will simply be a "win" situation because it will satisfy my goals.
In general, I believe that I have a win/win paradigm. For example, when I'm having a conflict with someone, I try to compromise with that person to resolve the issue. I try to be empathetic and understand why that person is feeling that way. With this mentality, I almost never have serious conflicts with anyone.
I believe that the win/win paradign suits me the best out of the six. I am always looking for a better solution to problems and always finding new things out about my self every week. I find myself agreeing with others very easily, but have no problem coming up with a more reasonable solution.
I find that the paradigm of Win/Lose is the way I go about life. I am very stubborn and will most always never back down if I think i am right. I always believe that what I think is correct. Now, people give up with me because they know i won't give up. I always say "I win, you lose!" I take the augthoritarian approach saying that I get my way and you do not get yours. I use my position, power, credentials, possessions, or personality to get my way. The academic world reinforces the Win/Lose mentality. One time when I was a big arguement with someone I finally found out that I was right and I definately rubbed it in their face. I think winning is important and that if you lose to me and you smack talk before hand I will definately bring out that you lost. The Win/Lose paradigm is the way I go about life.
Through my life there are alot of pardigms one instance of a win/lose situation I can think of is when I was able to negotiate to my father that since it was my birthday I should be able to get an extra ticket for my friend, this was a win for me but to my brother who wanted the ticket that was a lose situation because he couldnt go.
I Use the win/win paradigm most of the time in my life dealing with people. I always try to do what is best for everyone. For example the other day Instead of doing what I wanted or what the other person wanted we found a third thing that both of us agreeded to do. So we both won.
i think that i mostly have win paradigms. whenever i am trying to get something done, like homework, i put everything else aside so that i can get things done. when i'm trying to get something done, i'm not really concerned with other people, just about myself and what i am doing.
i could best relate to the win/win paradigm because i like to win but care about the other person feeling happy also
Well it all depends on what situation to decide which tactic i use. In some cases i have to be a lose/win and in others i will pull the win/win maneuver. It all depends on the moment.
I am a win/win paradigm because in my family, we tend to compromise if we don't agree on something, so we both end up getting something that we won't.
I'd have to go with the win/lose situation. This is because I'm the kind of guy who is a fan of gaining, and I mean honestly for me to be able to gain, someone usually can't. For example: being a freshman on the varsity soccer team forced some of the older players to sit on the bench because I earned a starting position. I gained an awesome opportunity but it was at the expense of some of the upper classmen. Therefore, I feel the win/lose paradigm is what is relative to my life as can be seen by this situation.
I would say I am the win/win situation because i like to win a lot but if it's possilbe for the other person to win then that is fine as well. An example is if i want something to eat and my mom wants me to run erands with her then i run erands and she has to get me something to eat
I feel that i express the win/win paradigm in my life because may parents made me maintain good grades and in return i get to keep my car.
In my short but eventfull life, i have experienced many different paradigms. I feel that i am seen acheiving more win/win situations because i tend to be a good "priceling negotiator". Therefore i make both sides happy.
i believe many things in life are lose/win situations. people are put through obstacles in life and it is up to them to fight through those and have their own personal victory. people sometimes are forced to make sacrifices that lead to the greater good.
I can think of a win win situation with my job at Limited Too. Nobody ever wanted to come in and buy or work so they needed more people and I needed a job. I went in for a job interview and turns out I got hired. Now I get to work all the time and I don't have to do that much because nobody ever comes in. It's a win win situation because its an easy job and I'm making money and my manager wins because she needed someone to work extra shift so now she doesn't have too.
I am a win/win person. I want to compromise, so we are both happy. I like to win, but not if someone else has to lose. Winning is not worth it to me, if someone else is losing.
I beleive in a win/win mindset. I have learned this through sports. In sports you contribute towards the team through your hard work and effort. Therefore the team wins. The individual wins because he has gained life lessons and personal gains from playing the sport. Its a win/win situation.
I would consider myself a follower of the "Win/Lose" paradigm. The quote "If you're not first, then you're last," is a good quote to express my attitude. This quote from Talladega Nights is one of the most influential quotes I have experienced. I like to be a competetor in whatever I partake in, and enjoy winning. I hate to lose, and will do whatever I need to do to win.
I like to hold up to the paradigm, win/win, because it nice when both competitors benefit. It is like that, especially with my friends and family. Being too competitive just to win will not have the best results because the feelings of others should be considered. With my friends, I try to make a decision with them for the good of everyone we are including so everyone will be happy and satisfied. People should be taught about how trying to win by competition all the time isn't everything and that true winner acts like a leader to help out others win.
I would have to say that the Win/Win or No Deal paradigm best describes some instances in my life. Others that have posted before me have used schools an example. Who doesn't like to get good grades? I do. I also like to help people too, if I can. Therefore, if I can win by getting the good grades and help someone else by partnering up with them I would do it. However, there always has to be that one leach in a class. There have been times where I have partnered up with someone and they expect me to do everything. Thats when I say they're on their own.
I would say I most closely follow the Win paradigm. I am rather apathetic towards other people's goals and am only concerned about my own. A good example from my life would be if my brother wants to have friend's over but I also want to have friend's over. I will argue until I can have people over and don't care if he has people over or not as long as I can.
I try to be in win/win situations. Like if I want to go to the Britney Spears concert than I volunteer to wash my dads car. He gets a car wash, I get Britney Spears. Pretty good deal i'd say.
I think most of my life I find my self in a "win" paradigm. Generally, I don't think that I care about whether other people suceed or fail as long as they don't interfer with my winning. If I don't wan't to do something then I won't. However if you try to prevent me from doing well then you will most likely regret it. For most people it is in they're best intrest to stay out of my business. Because at the end of the day the truth is that i make my choices based on wether they will help me win.
Interestingly I often find myself in either Win/Win or Lose/Win type of situations. However the two interchanging ways is perhaps a more effective way to approach people of the society today considering that most people of our society, unless other wisely taught, are naturally aligned to the Win/Lose or the Lose/Lose model and thus in consideration of others, many of my choices and decisions are based on the consideration of others over myself. The Lose/Win situation isn’t as quite as a negative way of thinking as it was described in the book, for I often find myself using the Lose/Win method when dealing with many of the extremely egoistic individuals found in everyday settings. Lose/Win is a quite effective way to deal with aggression using passive-aggression to prevent both side from losing, or in a more real life situation, preventing some sort of revenge or getting equal method to be exact upon myself if the other person is aligned strictly to the Win/Lose (With the secondary characteristic of Lose/Lose) model, which again, is not uncommon what so ever.
I would definately have to say that I am more than often in a lose/win paradigm. My friends always like to have their way. It is often what they want or the high way. I normaly concede to what they do just because I don't like confrontation. Life is always better if you look out for the wants and needs of others.
I beleieve I have the lose/win paradigm. I will usually try to please another person by just giving in to what ever they want because I usually dont care. It does sometimes gets annoying because people eventually take advantage of that fact.
i find alot of the win/win characteristics in myself. i notice that i always try to find the best ways to deal with things so they dont turn into a lose/lose situation
i tend to seek a win/win paradigm. I am a kind of person that always wants everybody to be happy. for instance when i disagree with one of my friends i usually try to compromise with them because i think compromise is always more beneficial.
i cant really lable myself to one of these paradigm. It all depends on who i am dealing with. Im not so competative that I always have to win, but im not a push over to have to lose. I have taken the blame for many things and have been ok with it because i was helping someone else out. I have also never fallen into something that i dont want to do, therefore i have to win. That is my way of dealing with all 6 of the paradigms.
I find myself falling into the win/lose paradigm, along with the lose/win depending on the situation at hand, normally i am a very compeative person and i am also very stubborn at times in everyday life and i hate being wrong or losing so i fall into the win/lose paradigm , but in a relationship i tend to fall more into of the lose/win paradigm to prevent a fight...which is weird because i don't think its right to have to always be the one to back down even in situations where i am right just to prevent a fight.
I believe i am a win/win just because im highly competitive but at the same time i think things through before i do them. I will think about the outcome and how it might effect other people. I usually try to make decisions on what is fair so that everyone is happy.
In most situations, i like to pursue a "win win" outcome. However, in most cases, if i cannot achieve a "win win" outcome, i will make sure I at least still "win" or if necessary "win, lose" in order to avoid a "lose win, or lose lose." That said, I will always think to benefit others as well first, but if i am in competition with them and no deal can be made, i will do what i must to win.
I find that in most cases in my life that i have been in they have involved the win/win paradigm. I am the type of person that wants to make everyone happy. Although sometimes i have gone to a win/lose if it is something that i want to do bad enough. I still believe this guy is QUACK!
The relationship between my brother and I is sometimes a "lose/win" situation. The other day my brother and I were sent to clean up our horse barn together. We ended up fighting over which jobs were more demanding and criticizing each other over the other's abilities. In the end, I ended up doing the jobs he didn't wish to do in order to get the job done faster and to keep the peace. The resentment of giving in to his way eventually built up, and I ended up overacting to his teasing. In the end, both my brother and I apologized to each other.
In the case of Emerald Belles, I usually find myself using the "Win, Win" paradigm. Because of my placement as an officer to this team, I am always trying my hardest to dance to the best of my ability and be a very effective leader. In doing this, I have the intention of influencing the other members to become the best dancers they can be and help them reach that goal through working hard and believing in themselves.
I myself am not a very competitive person over minor desicions that are to be made. I just kind of go with the flow, but in my family there are multiple win/win personalities. My father and sister are both very competitive, so everything that wouldn't really be that big of a deal can turn into an ignorant arguement. Two people with the same characteristics can never come to an agreement since both want their own way and won't change their mind.
the win win or no deal paradigm i think illustrates my sttitude aoubt life the most im not a very compromising person and if things get messed up i tend to jsut walk away and i think that can be both a good and bad thing
Lose/lose. Last year, I had a huge fight with the girl who used to be my best friend. The only thing that I cared about at that time, was that she had a bad time and that her life was bad. Later, I realized that I did not enjoy those months at all either, so basically it was not worth it...
I think of myself as a Win/Win person. When i do something it is always what do i get out of it and how will it benifit me and the person im dealing with. Im always looking for a benifit or compromise to make either person im with happy as well as myself. i do not enjoy making another person upset over a compromise. This is why i am a Win/Win on the paradigm.
I would say that I have the win/lose mentality. I've been playing sports my whole life and it has made me very competitive. I always give my best effort to win because I hate losing.
During my work life i find that we constantly show a win/win paradigm between myself and the managers. If were really slow we clean around the store so we can leave early. It shows win/win because we get everything done early and get to leave early enough to enjoy the rest of the day.
i found characteristics that represent the win/lose paradigm. in athletic competitions i had to win so others would lose. i think all forms of competitive events require the win/lose paradigm.
I would have to say the paradigms that describes something that happens in my life the most would be the win/win one. In the win/win paradigm, it talks about how the decision you make is the best for yourself and others around you, and I try to make decisions that are the best for myself and my family and friends so everyone is happy and satisfied. I work at Chix, and an example of a win/win situation would be when I sell someone something while working. It makes myself satisfied because I helped out the company, and it satisfies the costumer because he/she will be happy with there purchase.
I am a win person. I'll do what it takes to do whatever and I don't much care what anyone else does
sure, a win/win solution is the best way to go... if we were all miss america. nobody thinks win/win, the world is full of people who care only about what they get out of a situation. always thinking win/win can turn you into a pushover as well. you're bound to cross some stubborn old geezer who wont compromise so you end up altering your needs so much to where the solution may not even benefit you at all. enter every conflict with a win/win mentality but dont be afraid to show that you can be a win/lose kind of person. hate to say it but always thinking win/win may not get you anywhere fast.
I would say that I am the type of person who involves the win/win paradigm. I always want to succeed but never at the cost of anyone else failing, especially my friends. I am very competitive in sports and things like ping pong and I believe in that aspect of my life I am more win/lose obviously, but in every other situation I tend to follow the win/win paradigm.
There have been many events in my life that illustrate the win/lose paradigm. Although the book says this paradigm is not ultimitly the best way, in all of my situations it has been the right choice for me. All of the situations i am thinking of involve protecting my own rights and beliefs. I didn's agree that "the habit of effective interpersonal leadership is Think Win/Win" because i think a major part of being a leader is sticking to your beliefs and not compromising with peer presure.
Well, naturally I'm a win/win person. The best way to do this is to preemptively prevent the conflict. As no conflict has existed, there is no need to compromise, therefore everyone gets everything they want.
The win/win or no deal paradigm is helpful when it comes to compromising and I feel that my friends and I use it frequently. A situation that comes to mind is when you want to go see a movie with a group of people, but you all have different likes and dislikes. My friends and I compromise and go see a movie that maybe isn't our first choice, but something we might still enjoy. Sometimes an agreement can't be reached and seeing a movie turns into a "no deal" situation.
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